The Myth of Non-Stop Hustling

How much happiness does chasing success and grinding non-stop really bring? From the pressures of constant achievement to the discipline of daily hustle, to the power of slowing down and focusing on what truly matters. Today's episode dives into the work-life balance and the pursuit of a life that’s not only successful but also authentic and fulfilling. 

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Transcript

Hi. Welcome back to the Unrelatable podcast. I'm your host, Hannah, and I had some really interesting conversations at my last family function. How was your Thanksgiving? Did we all survive?

Mine was actually really enjoyable. We went to this adult zoo where you get to feed the animals, and, yeah, it was just really wholesome and fun. I shared a few stories of that on my Instagram. But, anyways, back to the conversations. Usually, when you are getting together with your family and extended family, you haven't seen them in a long time, you have discussions over how your life is going, what your work is, if you're liking your work, what your career is centered on, what's coming up next, all those super fun topics.

And so, yeah, we were talking about work and careers and what makes work valuable, what makes your what what makes it worth it? What makes it exciting? And I used to believe that whatever I did for work, I needed it needed to be my passion. I wanted to make money doing something I love. Right?

Don't we all? And I felt that if I loved what I did all the time for work, then that is the definition of success. Right? But that's nice and fluffy and rainbows and butterflies, and sometimes your 9 to 5 is just a 9 to 5. And that's not me necessarily saying that I don't enjoy my job my job.

I do enjoy my job. The questions were more based on, alright. So what do you see yourself doing next? Are you going to continue doing social media management and the things that you're doing? And I just thought, I don't know.

I have no I have absolutely no idea. That is, in fact, an answer I'm giving a lot right now is I do not know. And, again, sometimes your 9 to 5 is just a 9 to 5 because life isn't about work, and work is simply meant to sustain your life and make it possible to do all the things that you love. And I know this might not be how everybody feels, of course, and it might be something that fluctuates. Maybe you love your job in the beginning, and later on, you end up deciding you don't love it anymore.

And I feel like that's the natural progression in life and so many things, in your passions, in your hobbies, in work. And I've done my passions for my job, and I did end up becoming a little burnt out, for example, with personal training and group fitness. It's something where I realized the gym and fitness is my passion. But when it came to personal training and all of that jazz, it kind of changed it for me as to where it became a job and no longer a hobby and a passion. And so for me, that wasn't necessarily what I realized I needed to do.

But if I wouldn't have tried it, I would have never known, which is why I'm such a big advocate for trying everything. Do as many things as you want to until you do find what you do love. And when I say love, you know, it doesn't have to be a passion. It can just be something exciting or something fulfilling. Again, there's the natural ebb and flow of work.

It it can't always be rainbows and butterflies. Right? I mean, if it was, then we would just work for the rest of our lives and never retire. And some people do actually do that, but I am more talking to the audience of people in my age range and young adults. So, yeah, as I've been approaching the ripe year of 28 I'm turning 28 in February, which is a little wild to me, but I am grateful and excited because, yes, aging is a privilege.

We know it. We love it. But as I've been approaching it, I've been really reflecting a lot on how my values have evolved. And I used to be completely consumed by hustle culture, chasing success, quote, unquote success, where you're grinding all day and night and believing that achievement is the key to fulfillment and that your life is defined by what you achieve and what you do. And, obviously, that's a little bit toxic.

Right? I feel like in Utah, that is one thing that while we have so many businesses that are started here and it is huge for entrepreneurs and success started young, and there's so many reasons for that. But I do think it can kind of throw you into a cycle of almost caring about the wrong things, almost letting the year slip by and then thinking, oh my gosh. What have I what have I been what have I been doing? You know, I've over time, I've realized that what matters what matters what matters most isn't any title or constant pursuit of more, but it's the time that I'm spending with the people who truly bring positivity and balance into my life.

I've really come down to appreciate the importance of slowing down and prioritizing relationships. You know, those who support and love me for who I am and not just for what I do or what I can provide for them. Because when you are in the summer sale space, oftentimes, if you are a an owner or a manager or someone who's higher up, everyone is just constantly, what can you offer them and what can you do for them? And it's a very transactional relationship. And then upon leaving that space and then starting, you know, our own business, it became very clear that, oh, okay.

90% of these relationships were just transactional, and that's okay. You know, I don't hold any resentment towards that or anything like that because it just really comes down to again, life's richness comes from authentic connections and not from the external the external success, the external validation from people that at the end of the day, they're not actually going to call you in a year to see how you're doing. You know what I'm saying? And, again, this is it's just the people that remind you that success isn't about what you accomplish. It's who you have beside you and who, at the end of the day, ultimately brings you peace.

Who, at the end of the day, do you want to be around? Do you feel peace with your family and your friends? Are you feeling like you're in the right circle? And with all of these reflections on what really matters, you know, the deeper connections, spending your time, having time well spent, and the things that really bring true fulfillment, it's really made me think a lot about how we define success. And I've realized that real success isn't just about financial gains or big milestones, such as purchasing a house and purchasing rental properties or cars or this and that.

It's about living in alignment with what truly brings you joy and peace. And so I've been questioning, how do we navigate that balance between chasing passion and chasing money? Can we have both, or do we need to choose one over the other? And so that's kind of what I want to talk about a little bit today, how we can build a life that feel that feels fulfilling and authentic rather than simply just chasing constantly in the constant work flow and the constant, okay, what is next? What is the next goal?

I am exhausted. Can I be honest? I am, like, I'm exhausted from the hamster wheel of, okay, what is the next big thing? Constantly chasing the next biggest thing, the next top idea. I don't know.

I think I am just tired, and I it makes me think about the 12 week year that I introduced to my podcast at the beginning of this year in 2024, and I didn't end up doing that. And there are many reasons why, but I hit a wall of extreme exhaustion this year because of, I think, the constant pursuit of more. And it's really helped me realize what is important. You know, do I am I happy? Is this something that I want to constantly pursue?

Of course, it is so beneficial to set your life up for success, to set your life up for your future babies and children and family to have success. But what is the final cost of it, and is there a balance that we can achieve? So if that is something that you are interested in listening to me chat about today, I welcome you back to the pod, and, yeah, welcome back to the Unrelatable podcast. I received a few comments about this topic. So I wanna share those in the very beginning just to get us thinking a little bit.

This first response said, I would rather prefer a better work life slash home life balance than a high earning career. Family is and will always be more important than a job. This next one says, everybody wants to be 5 years ahead of everyone else. But 5 years ahead of everyone else in what? Wasted youth?

That's the thing. If putting you all into your career in your twenties guaranteed a huge pay raise and promotion, plenty of people would do it, but it doesn't. It is not guaranteed. The next comment says, it's not a sacrifice for nothing. It costs a lot.

It gives you a higher chance of an extra side of depression, estranged children, alcoholism, drug addiction, self medication, or dying alone, wishing you'd have spent more time with your family and friends before they realized you weren't there for them, so they stopped reaching out. Obviously, these are from people in all different phases in their life, but I think it's true. I think we talk a lot about the sacrifice. The sacrifice for a better future and a better you. This is very obvious when it comes in the terms of fitness and in my example, bodybuilding.

I mean, I've talked all the time about the sacrifices that you make and the, quote, unquote, higher purpose that it is for and discipline and whatever. But what are you sacrificing in other ways? Well, you're sacrificing time with family and friends when you are at the gym or you're doing extra cardio. You're sacrificing the health of your body, actually, in my own humble opinion, by doing cycles of dieting and bulking and not really ever maintaining something for a long period of time. And I kind of realized this when I did my last few shows because I had never looked so gaunt in the face, and that's because I had a huge lack of collagen.

So the more you compete, the more you diet, you're losing that collagen in your face and you actually look older. That's okay. That's not you know, obviously, looks are not the end all be all. But, I mean, that's funny saying that about a bodybuilding competition. But I think you know what I'm saying.

And that's not me saying I'll never do one ever again, but I've just really been taking a look at my priorities and what I have prioritized over the years and kind of thinking about what is actually the most important thing for me. And the fact that, yeah, you are sacrificing in one way, but that leads to a lot of sacrifices on the other side. So I wanna talk about status versus passion because there is a huge difference between working for the approval of others, whether that be praise or acknowledgment from your peers to be flashy and, oh, they're successful. That is all extrinsic motivation. It's based on external validation.

And is that worth it? You kind of have to think to yourself, why am I doing this? Is this for me, or is it for the way I'm being perceived? Because when you spend your life working for external validation, it leads to numerous things. And the first is the fact that you're constantly seeking approval.

When your self worth is based on other people's opinions, it can lead to a cycle where you're always trying to measure up to others expectations, which can feel exhausting and unfulfilling. Because at the end of the day, even if you end up achieving it well, okay. Cool. What did it actually do? You know what I'm saying?

Unless you're out here donating all of the funds and changing people's lives and whatnot, what did we actually accomplish here? Oh, the fact that other people are now more impressed about you. Well, why do we care about their opinions of us in the first place? I don't know. Just a thought.

The second one is a lack of fulfillment. External validation is so fleeting, and I think we can see that with social media influencers who end up burning out really fast because and I've had that happen to me where I I don't know if you know this, but I got up to, I think, 40,000 followers on my Instagram. And shortly after hitting the highest peak of my followers, this was back in 2017, I quit. I couldn't do it. I was super depressed, and I've kind of had those cycles happen over and over again where I end up finding a lot of success, and then I end up quitting.

And there's actually lots of reasons for that that I won't talk about today, but other people's expectations are just exhausting. And so when you are, when you are spending your life working for that external validation and you want that praise and recognition, well, it fades so quickly, which leaves you just seeking even more approval. Obviously, this all comes down to a root of our needs and cares when we were a child. Right? And the ways that we were paid attention to as a child or maybe not paid attention to.

Maybe you're really aligning with this, and you're thinking, oh my gosh. This is me. Why do I do this? Well, typically, obviously, it all roots from our childhood. How were you how did you experience childhood?

Were you only recognized when you were achieving big things? Were you only recognized when you got MVP or when you won certain things. I don't know. You know what I'm saying? It always stems back to our childhoods.

And so I think that's where we can actually find a big find a big amount of empathy for people. Because even if you aren't thinking this is you, maybe you're thinking of somebody else. And that's when we have the chance to be able to recognize that. Well, hey. Maybe that's the only way they were ever paid attention to as a child.

So this is all that you know. You know what I'm saying? Okay. So the next thing that spending your life working for external validation can lead to is a lot of insecurity and self doubt. Because when you rely on others to validate your success, to validate your identity, you could really struggle with being insecure.

Because if you don't end up receiving the the recognition that you're hoping for, it'll lead to feeling inadequate and doubting yourself. This will make you question your value and your and your achievements even more. And, unfortunately, I experienced this. I know I've already shared this on the podcast before, but when I competed back in 2022 No. I think it was actually 2021.

Right? Oh my gosh. 3 years ago. Is that right? Oh my goodness.

That's really weird. Okay. Yeah. 2021. I trained for so long.

I dieted for over a year. The year of being in a deficit and working extremely hard is a very long time. I don't know if you've ever done that before, but it's really long and it's really hard, and I don't suggest it. But I ended up taking 5th, and I was devastated. I had a really cool photo shoot, which I had never done a swimwear or I'm not talking about, like, I don't know how to explain it, but it was like a swimwear photo shoot photographer.

But I was gonna wear, like, a sports bra and shorts and have it be a little bit more sporty, and I canceled it because I got 5th place, and I felt so inadequate. Why? Why did I do that to myself? Why did I cancel? First of all, not cool to the photographer because they're missing out on on that spot.

I don't know. It was just it makes me sad to think that way or that I thought that way because looking back, I was so fit. I had worked so hard, and I really deserved that. Later on, I ended up being able to do several shoots with a friend, and that was really empowering. And I really learned a big lesson that way.

I feel like we always learn our biggest lessons with our failures or our losses, and so that was one of mine. But the next thing that we can lose if we're just living our life for external validation is the loss of personal identity. Focusing on the expectations of others will cause you to lose sight of who you truly are. Because once you start prioritizing that approval of other people over your own desire and your own values and your own goals, well, that's going to lead you from feeling even more disconnected from your I hate using the word authentic self, but it's true. Right?

There's never been there's never been a more unfulfilling feeling than when you are making decisions out of what everybody else wants you to be. And at the end of the day, when you lay your head on your pillow and you close your eyes and you just hate your life. Not to be not to be dramatic, but when you are not aligned at all with the way that you're living your life and you you do lose your identity, And you kind of I mean, at least for me, I opened up my eyes one day, and I was like, what is what is actually going on? Why am I living this way? I don't even recognize who I am.

I don't even enjoy the life that I'm living. I've been prioritizing the approval and the needs of other people over my own, and you just end up being so disconnected from yourself. And that leads to the next one, which is burnout and exhaustion. Because constantly working to gain we could even switch this because I was gonna say recognition. Even if you're just trying to gain approval or love or anything like that, that pressure to perform or be validated by others or to just simply care for other people can drain your mental and emotional energy so quickly, leaving you to feel exhausted and unmotivated.

And when that happens, it ends up shifting our values away from things that we really felt was important to us. Right? I mean, have you ever been in a career where you keep getting promoted over and over again, and it's not really in the direction you thought you would go? And suddenly, you feel like you're living a life in which others deem successful or valuable, but you don't even know why you're there. And you don't like it, you don't love it, and you're you just have this internal conflict and dissatisfaction with it, and that can cause so much strain in your life.

It can cause strain in your friends, in your family, in your relationships. When you are more interested in impressing other people than in having genuine supportive connections, People can tell. People can really tell. And it that's one thing that I learned a lot, for example, with summer sales. You can really tell who was in it for I mean, obviously, at the end of the day, with summer sales, for example, since I keep bringing that up.

You're in it for the money. Right? You really are. And at the end of the day, you gotta take home a paycheck. But it's there's no secret that it is such a competitive way of life or way of work that you can really get lost in the opinions and values of other people.

And you can have people that really just are there to, I don't know, just to raise their own rate raise their own I don't know what I'm saying. Basically, people sometimes are only looking out for themselves. And, obviously, again, that comes down to your childhood and whatnot, and it just becomes more and more obvious. It's what I think what I'm gonna say. It just becomes more and more obvious who what people's real intentions are and where their focus is, And it can really destroy your relationships, and that's really sad.

So, obviously, we don't wanna make it to that one. We don't want it to cause that relationship strain. And lastly, the last one I had, number 8, is the pursuit of external validation will create unrealistic expectations. You may never feel good enough because there's always going to be somebody else to impress or another milestone to reach, leading to the perpetual state of dissatisfaction of your life and the dissatisfaction of everybody else around you. Because if you're dissatisfied with yourself and your life, it's going to translate to everybody else around you, which goes back to, you know, putting a strain on your relationships.

And so, ultimately, yeah, external validation, external motivation will lead to a life driven by other people's standards, which can make you feel so disconnected from your true desires. And it makes it impossible for you to have deep and lasting fulfillment in your life. And so how can we avoid this? And if we've been living in it, what can we do to get away from it? Well, focusing on the opposite of that, which is intrinsic motivation, finding value and purpose within yourself, independent of anybody else's opinions.

Working 60 to 80 hour work weeks used to be a flex, and I'm so glad I'm so glad that we're we're we're moving away from that because it's not a flex. For a long time, you know, those long work hours were seen as a sign of dedication and success and even a badge of honor. And when I say it's a flex, I I mean, I don't know how old everyone is who's listening to this. But when I was in, I think, my freshman year of college, that's really when Instagram was taking off in the beginning, and that's when the accounts were super popular of, you know, the branding of a lion and hard work and discipline over everything and all these things. And if you are not awake by 4 AM and don't have your workout done by 2 AM, then you are a lazy POS.

People wore it like a flex or a symbol of their commitment. Often at the expense of, you know, your own personal time and your health. I did that. I mean, I have on my on my fitness Instagram, which I used to post on every single day. I only now, I think, have a 180 posts or maybe a little less than 200 or something.

I used to have, I think, 800 posts, maybe. I deleted so much. So much of it, I've deleted because I don't like it. I don't like the mindset that I was in for such a long time. A lot of times, I would say your body is a reflection of your discipline.

And, while bodies can be a reflection of discipline, It's not the end all be all, and that's not the measurement as to what we should be defining our success in life, defining our value. And I did do that for a long time because I thought that that's what health was, was having an extreme level of discipline. And so I ended up deleting a whole bunch of posts because I just didn't like the message I was putting out. And I didn't wanna delete all of them because they are good memories. It's kinda like a journal.

Right? It's a journal, and it's phases of life that I've gone through, and it represents things that I have learned in my personal life. And a lot of the posts that I deleted, I used to post workout videos almost every single day. And, oh my goodness, one time I was looking through them. I think I was looking through them in 2021 or 2022, and I just thought to myself, holy holy cow.

My form on some of those earlier videos was so terrible. I thought I cannot have this. This is insane. And I just archived them, so I still have them. And maybe one day, I'll do, like, a satire video about critiquing myself and the terrible ways that I was living.

Anyways, I'm way off topic topic now. Basically, I'm just glad that the narrative of working extremely long hours has kind of begun to be challenged because there's such a huge impact of constantly working. Working, you know, 80 hours a week might seem like a way to, quote, unquote, get ahead, but it leads to burnout so quickly. And this exhaustion will impact your physical and mental health and your relationships and quality of life. And research has actually shown, look at me, some research, that working more than 40 hours a week consistently can lead to reduced productivity and creativity.

I mean, after a certain point, working longer hours doesn't mean necessarily mean better results. It doesn't. And we kind of have to take into account the lost moments and memories. It's kind of like that first comment that I said in the very beginning of it's not a sacrifice for nothing. You're not just sacrificing your time.

You are sacrificing lost moments. You're missing out on life experiences and spontaneous nights out with friends and time spent with family. And I'm not saying all this so that anyone regrets anything. Again, I don't regret how I have I mean, I guess, I do have some regrets in my life, but I try not to. But I but I still do sometimes, and I gotta work through those.

But I think that it's just about being able to have those spontaneous nights with your friends and the energy to be able to have that. Because it's been a long time since I have had the energy to be spontaneous because of I feel like the exhaustion that I have been in, what feels like 2 or 3 years. I'm working on this. I really am. But those moments, you know, times with your family and simple joys of traveling and or even just relaxing, these are the ones that can build those memories and contribute to your overall happiness, and it's a trade off.

Right? Memories and the quality of your life in your twenties, these years are often seen as the time for us to explore, to grow, and to make connections. And building meaningful memories with friends, traveling, all these things, they shape our experience in this world in ways that working long hours never will. And those are the memories that will carry on for life. There have been countless times where I worked so much or where I saw other people working so much, and the time flies by and suddenly 8 months are gone.

And you're just thinking, what have I done for the last 8 months? And, again, I don't ever want this to come across weird or anything like that because I have traveled. But that traveling has come in the more recent years as a byproduct to the hustle culture, I guess, as a byproduct to working so many long hours. But I think I talked about it earlier this year of, yeah, of when you are self employed, there are benefits and disadvantages as to where, yeah, we can pick up and travel. I can go and travel when I would like to because I do work remote.

But when you're working constantly all the time, you lose out on on other things. And so, yeah, I just feel like the memories that we make in our twenties are ones that we'll carry for the rest of our life. Right? And working hard is great, but not at the expense of our life. It shouldn't consume us.

Focusing on our personal relationships and self care will actually lead to us being able to work, leading us to our better work performance. Sorry. Lost my words there for a second. It'll lead to better work performance in the long run because then you're mentally and emotionally refreshed. And the experiences that we get from traveling and taking time off to explore the world, you already know how how much how fun that is.

You already know it. We I don't know anyone who does not like to travel. And I feel like it can really not only develop your personal growth and perspectives, but your creativity because it's inspiring, and it provides a different type of wealth, adventuring does. You know, memories and experiences that last forever and ever and sounding a little bit corny. But, honestly, if I had to live in a little van down by the river, but I could travel, I'd just be one one happy girl because I and that's not a and that's not saying that I don't like being home because I do.

But I value them I don't know. I value them on the same plane where I do really value living in the moment. Whereas before, I think that this is something that a lot of you will relate to if you've experienced any mental health challenges, but sometimes you have to have things in life to look forward to. And that's actually advice that I give people in my life all the time when I know that they are struggling is sometimes you have to have a trip planned or a, you know, a vacate whether that's a vacation or a quick weekend self care off of work at home or, I don't know, a a fun place you're gonna travel. Sometimes you have to have those because it gives you the motivation to to keep going.

That sounds really corny, but it's true. And if you don't know what I'm talking about, I'm glad. But I think most of you probably do, where holidays and time with family and those really big moments are sometimes the things that keep you pushing and keep you working because I would like to say that the quality of life isn't about getting things done. It's about savoring the daily moments. But sometimes when your day to day life feels so exhausting, those are the things that are good to look forward to.

Anyways, I sound so cryptic. Sorry about that. Maybe I'll I won't delete that. If you've been listening till now, there you go. But the reason why I said that is because my next note is that living in the moment, you know, that's what the quality of life is about.

It's about enjoying the day to day day to day characteristics that make you laugh. I mean, laughing is the best thing in the world. And when someone makes you laugh and your friends and you're laughing with your friends and your family, and it just brings such a deep connection. And it is a I don't know. It's just a beautiful thing.

I think laughter is so underrated. Maybe it's not underrated. Maybe it's just something that we don't talk about all the time. But living in the moment when you I guess I'll take this back to what I just said a few minutes ago. Living in the moment when you have really hard mental health challenges is extremely difficult because that's essentially you are breaking down every single moment in your life.

So it just kinda feels like a constant hamster wheel of I don't know how to explain it. I think you know I think you know what I'm saying. But being able to live in the moment and being able to see the good things and to have gratitude, which people always say all the time, oh, if you're depressed, just be more grateful. I can tell you that's not that's not always the reason people are depressed. But living in the moment is something that I have really been working on recently and just being really grateful for the small things while still having things that I'm looking forward to in the future.

Because at the end of the day, being simply present is beautiful. But having things that you're looking forward to can also bring you through those really, really tough times. So there is a big trade off, and the trade off is sacrificing quality of life in the present. And, obviously, if you're someone right now that is focused on doing these things, then hats off to you. Proud of you, and you can do it.

But this is, as you can tell, this one this podcast episode today is kind of more about stepping away from that. So that's kind of what I'm focusing on. And so when you do choose to grind yourself into the ground for the sake of future rewards, a lot of the time, your quality of life in the present is sacrificed. And, you know, we might reach the success that you're striving for, but are you gonna have regrets about what you missed out on? And on the other hand, if you focus on balance, which does balance even exist?

That's something that I really think is an interesting conversation as well. And in a lot of my posts on my fitness Instagram, I would talk about that. I'd say balance for success doesn't exist. But I think I think that I have the answer for that now. And that's just how do you define your success?

How do you define it? Because that is the end all be all is your definition of success. And that's something that I have really been changing the script on what my definition is. And instead of seeing work as an endless hustle, I think having that connection with people and having the time off and hobbies, that doesn't just contribute to your happiness. It makes us better workers in the long term.

You know what I mean? Because it keeps us fulfilled and mentally clear. It's it's a conversation I see amongst mothers all the time. I mean, I'm not a mom, but I'm surrounded by friends who are mothers and friends who are about to be moms and, you know, my own mother and other people. And there's a big talk of if you just sacrifice yourself constantly in the name of everyone else, then you will be happy.

But if you give yourself self care and if you do make that time for you to have you time and to have your battery be replenished, you're going to end up being a better mother at the end of the day. And this is not me giving literally anybody advice. This is just me regurgitating conversations that I've been a part of or I've been in or even podcasts that I've listened to of the fact that sacrificing yourself for other people. And I guess I can apply that to my own life to some extent, but sacrificing yourself for everybody else in the name of their joy and their success and with your kids, you know, their safety and their love, running yourself into the ground for that is going to leave you so depleted that you will not be able to end up showing up how you want to. And I think that's kind of, yeah, that's kind of what I what I'm really working on.

Because the question really comes down to what are we gonna remember the most about our twenties? Are we gonna remember the hours spent chasing paychecks or all of the experiences along along the way? And for me, I think it's a little bit of both. I think that, again, I don't regret how I've been spending my last, you know, 10 years and living in 8 different states and always, you know, always moving towards the next big thing. But it definitely has had me realize a lot of things and reassess what is important to me over the last few years.

And I don't know. I do feel like hustle culture has been and work culture has been sort of shifting into a more positive direction. I don't know. What do you think? Do you think it's still super ingrained in society?

Obviously, it's gonna be different where you're living or who your family is and, of course, your childhood. Everything stems from stems from that, but we we learn so much. Right? There's always a trade off, and that's what I talked about a lot in, I think, the traveling episode is there's always a trade off. Always.

I mean, I don't have kids yet. That's a trade off. And from what I've seen from my friends who have kids, it is so fulfilling, and that's just not something I've been able to do yet. But I don't regret that because I know that it's just not my time yet. And I feel like having that mindset has been really helpful for me recently because there can be times in life where you just feel like, what?

Where am I going? What am I doing? But in my opinion, like I was talking about earlier, having your passion for your work, that can work for so long. Right? Maybe maybe you have your passion.

Maybe your work is your passion, and you're not burnt out. And I think that is a beautiful thing. And for me, I've kind of chased not really chased that, but I have not had I didn't go to college, so I haven't been in a single career for the last, you know, 10 it'll be 10 years since I've been an adult. I like to say that adults I'm like a 10 year old adult. Right?

And if you're 19, take it easy on yourself. You're only a 1 year old adult. And if you have spent your last your last 10 years or 5 years really just grinding yourself into the ground, it is a okay. I mean, we always have the chance to change things around, and maybe you didn't. Maybe you've spent the last 5 years being super chill and living your life really casually and fun.

And not to say I haven't been having fun the last 10 years at all, but you know what I mean. Right? Just like having more I I don't know what I imagine. This is what I imagine is manning in New York City or working abroad or working at a national park. All of those things sound really fun.

And, obviously, those are not gonna be things where they're extremely lucrative, but they're lucrative in their memories. Oh my goodness. No. It's just I feel like your priorities shift the older you get. And as you grow and live life, you really begin to realize what is important from you or for what is important for you.

And, again, I really did used to be all for that hustle of chasing success and grinding all day and night thinking that the more I achieved, the more fulfilled I would be. But as time has gone on, I've realized that the things I value the most now are not accomplishments. They're not titles. I've wanted to be an IFBB pro for so long. And for those that don't know what that is, it's a bodybuilding title.

It's basically a professional bodybuilder. Right? Or, you know, chasing the constant pursuit of external success. And what's really mattered more to me lately is the time that I spend with the people who fill my life with peace and love. You know, people who support and love me for who I am and not what I do, not what I can achieve or give them.

And I've really started to see that those relationships are the ones that make life rich. Cash not cash money rich, but soul filling rich. People that remind me to slow down and that I don't have to constantly I've had this, okay, I've had this thing in my mind where I constantly need to be growing. I don't I don't know what it is, but my dad told me the other day, he said, you do not have to constantly be growing. You're not a project for your entire life.

You're allowed to slow down. You are not a, you know it was really nice what he said. It was essentially like, you don't have to keep growing and growing and growing for what? Growing I I don't know. I just felt like a lot of my life, I have really thought that success comes down to what you accomplish and all the things you do, and it's not.

It's really not. It's about who you surround yourself with and what truly brings you peace. And that big part of getting older is realizing that I don't need to constantly be hustling to feel successful because it's not measured in money or achievements. It's about, again, the word authentic, the authentic connections that you build. And for me right now, that feels so much more important than anything else.

And as I've reflected on these shifts in my values, it's really made me think about the bigger picture of how we define success in general, which is, you know, what I mentioned earlier. I used to think it was about working hard to make money and thinking if I worked enough and earned enough, everything would fall into place. But as I started to realize that success isn't about constantly growing outwardly, it isn't about external achievements, I've began to understand something else, and that's the the power of pursuing your passion instead of just focusing on the financial gain. And, you know, being able to live a life purely motivated by money will not lead to true fulfillment ever. When you chase your passion, though, whether that is through a career or a hobby again, remember in the beginning, I told you I was talking to my family, and we were talking about the fact that sometimes your work is not your passion.

And that's okay because we exist outside of work. And if our work is not our passion, sweet. Well, guess what? Life isn't about work. And so when you're chasing your passion, when I say that now, I'm thinking in regards to outside of work, you know, or whether that is through a career.

But, also, it could be a hobby or simply exploring the things that excite you. It's not about the money. It's about the growth and the happiness that we feel in what we're doing. And, you know, maybe maybe you find a little bit of happiness in your job, but you feel fulfillment outside of it more, which I find so much more fulfilling. Sure.

You might not make as much money as, you know, the Joneses over there who are purely focused on climbing the corporate ladder or getting the next big deal or the next nicest car. But there's just something so much more rewarding about trusting yourself and trusting your own desires. Living a life driven by passion means that we're living for ourselves and not for external validation. It means that you get to actually create something that you're proud of even if it doesn't come with a big paycheck. I don't know.

Maybe I'm the last person on this planet that is learning these things. I mean, these have been my thoughts for a little while now, but the joy and fulfillment that comes from pursuing what you enjoy, that's what makes life worth living. You begin to find that happiness in the process itself rather than just the constant chase of the outcome. And while money is important, it's not the sole measure of success. Obviously, money is freedom, and it does bring that.

And the lack of money bring does bring stress. But being able to recognize that, hey. Maybe maybe my job isn't what I'm extremely passionate about. But guess what I am passionate about? I get to go home to my family.

I get to go and throw on the throw on the wheel and or go to the gym and really have an exciting time outside of work. Because your life being defined by your work, I don't know why that got so ingrained in me because I don't think that my parents even instilled that inside of me. So I'm still trying to figure that out. But living life in alignment with your passions and those intangible rewards of peace and creativity are just as valuable, if not more so, than what's in our bank account at the end of the day. And, honestly, that's where real happiness comes from.

Not from what you earn, but everything that we are creating and experiencing and doing along the way and the people that we have alongside of us. And I don't know. Maybe that was really corny. I think it might have been. But it's just been something that's been on my mind.

And so I'm I would happy that I was able to talk about that today. And that's everything I have for today's episode. I hope that you guys have the most wonderful weekend and that you're able to spend it with people that love and support you. And, yeah, I will talk to you very soon. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of the Unrelatable podcast.

Bye.