WFR! Valentines Day and Turning Twenty-ATE

Oh boy, are you in for the yapping of your life today! I'm giving you all the details you didn’t ask for—about both my first birthday and my first Valentine’s Day single in 11 years. We’ll also chat about the Super Bowl halftime show, recap my quick trip across the pond, catch up on pop culture news and more. Hope you enjoy <3

Thank you so much for listening!

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Transcript

Hi. Hello, and welcome back to another episode of the Unrelatable podcast. And happy weekly Friday recap, and also happy Valentine's Day. Will you be my Valentine if you're single? K.

Perfect. Even if you're married, you can be my Valentine. I've always thought that Valentine's Day is a cute holiday because you can really make it about what you wanna make it. And if you are sad by looking online and seeing everyone post about their forever Valentine's, then it's a good day to log off and to take yourself out to eat and to hang out with your girlfriends and have a fun Galentine's. My brother brought my sister and I flowers, protein bars, and protein drinks from Trader Joe's.

So you don't even need a boyfriend. You just need a brother who is pretty great. But no. So today, I'm going to just kind of give you a recap, basically, which is always what we do on Fridays. And I'm going to be recapping the halftime show of the Super Bowl.

I'm also going to be talking a bit about London, what I was doing there. And then in the very end, I'll do a small bodybuilding update if I have one. I'm trying to think if I have one. And then I'll do a birthday recap at the very, very end. But yeah.

So jumping right into it, I mean, we're gonna talk a little bit about a few other things first because I just have to tell you, ten to fifteen thousand women are gonna get pregnant today. So stay safe out there. And if it's on purpose, wonderful, but stay safe out there. Again, I don't know your situation, but it is stability is good, so let's use let's let's use some some good old common sense out here and just stay nice and safe. I can't believe that many people get pregnant.

I mean, I guess you might think it'd be a little honestly, I feel like it'd be a little bit more. Let me look it up. How many people get pregnant on Valentine's Day? Even though I already told you that stat, I'm pretty sure that stat is correct. Yeah.

Ten thousand to twelve thousand, it says. Babies are conceived on Valentine's Day each year in The US. This is based on birth trends showing a small spike in births around mid November approximately nine months later. However, the exact number varies, and Valentine's Day isn't the most common conception date. Holidays like Christmas and New Year's are often higher, which my brother was born September, so he was a New Year's baby maybe.

Anyways, we'll move on from that. Next on the agenda, I need to publicly apologize. Mhmm. I did something. I have listened to Kanye West for a very long time.

A very long time. I mean, my favorite song of his was, of course, Heartless. And I have that memorized front to back, back to front because of, you know, all the millions of heartbreaks I had before the age of 16. No. So I've listened to him for a long time.

I've watched his documentaries on him and kind of been following up with him over the years. And it's no secret that, you know, since his and Kim k's separation, he's kind of gone off the deep end a few times. And so he's tweaking out right now. And I feel the need to apologize for the use of using his song. In one of my last posts, I'm like, oh my gosh.

Please don't cancel me. I have not been keeping up with him very much as of late. So when I was picking a song, I was like, oh, I'll just I'll just choose this fun song. This is fun. I almost choose a different one by him, but it was a little bit too intense.

So, anyways, he's tweaking out. It started about a week ago, and, essentially, he's super anti Semitic, which I guess everybody but me knew. So he tweeted on x. He tweeted, Jews hate white people. Mhmm.

So he's beginning this rant. And in order to tweak something like that, he must have fired his PR team and seems to be, unfortunately, in a manic episode, I would guess, because he's ranting online about Jews, which is insane, and I guess this is something that he has done before. Again, I guess I've just haven't really been keeping up to date like I should have. And Elon Musk then snapped back at him. And out of all things that he decided to reply to, he responded and said, to think Jews aren't white is insane.

So we are officially living in idiocracy because why are the first of all, I know that the whole point of access to freedom of speech, but having hate speech is completely different in my opinion because then Kanye goes on to post the photo of Elon, you know the one at the presidential inauguration. Mhmm. Yep. That one. And wrote hail, Elon.

Yeah. So he's going a bit insane, and then he had some really weird text exchanges and started tweeting that he had slept with the president's daughter. That's another big thing that he said. It's just he's going off the rails. And so David Schwimmer, is that how you say his last name?

He's the he's best known for his role on Friends. I don't know if I don't know if you guys have watched Friends as if I'm not talking to a whole bunch of, you know, fellow, old Gen z or millennials. Anyways, David Schwimmer and many other celebrities have been calling Elon out saying, hey. Like, do something about these posts. This is hate speech.

And I know a lot of people think that everything should be allowed. But when you have influence, sometimes, in my own opinion, you can't let certain things slide. So then what did Kanye go on to do? Well, by the way, this is I've I haven't seen any of this for myself. I've seen it recapped in a few different videos, so that's why I'm recapping.

But the reason why I have to say that is because the next update was that he was posting a bunch of corn. I'll say the word corn on his Twitter. Okay? Like this man, what is even happening? So then finally, this is all happening within the last seven days.

Okay? And then four days ago, he finally deactivated his Twitter. And the update within the last twenty four hours is that Kanye and Bianca are now getting a divorce with a $5,000,000 settlement that she has agreed upon. So round of applause. I just feel like I had to give you that whole train wreck of details because, number one, I used his song in one of my last posts, and I I do not stand by him or anything that he says or represents.

Yeah. Number two, we had talked a little bit about how she was completely nude, essentially, at the Grammys and how sickening it is that that's been allowed. And I don't know. I think I did mention this in the Grammy's recap. But in Julia Fox's memoir, which I had no idea who she was until I read her book, but she dated Kanye for, like, a week and said that that's exactly what he would do is he would only allow you to wear what he wanted you to wear.

He controlled everything and anything, and she never ended up signing an NDA. So she was able to talk about these things, and she never names him, but it's very public information. So seeing her, Bianca, walking around bare feet didn't she go to Disneyland bare with bare feet? It's just insane. So good on her.

She's the real winner here walking out with $5,000,000. I hope that public shaming was worth it. I mean, girl, we're here for you if you need us. It's actually insane. So, yeah, I had to had to talk about that and just disclose the fact that it's insane, and it's really too bad.

And it's just another story of another artist who is, like, losing their mind. Another one is Justin Bieber. Supposedly wait. What's the word that you're supposed to use so that it's you can't be sued for what you're saying? I'll just say supposedly.

I'll say none of this is true. I don't know what the word is. I forget what it is. But, supposedly, he's being followed around constantly because he's on watch because of his drug use, and, apparently, it's gotten really, really bad. So that's really sad, especially with their new newer baby.

I'm pretty sure they had a baby, what, six months ago. So people are really going through it. People are going through it. And and, yeah, let's move forward. Okay.

We're gonna talk about the Super Bowl. What did you guys think? I felt like there were a lot of mixed reviews. Obviously, everyone on the news didn't like it, of course. But I wanted to break it down for you guys.

I got a DM, and they were like, are you gonna cover the Super Bowl? The only reason why I knew about the songs and the beef was because of your coverage on it a few months ago. So I thought, you know what? Let's do it. So we're gonna talk about that.

Basically, his performance is following Kendrick's journey throughout America and him chasing his American dream or, you know, playing the American game because it has been phrased as the American dream, but we're all kind of learning it's a game of sorts, and there is a hierarchy. And yeah. Anyways, we're not gonna get into, like, all of that kind of stuff. But beginning scene, the entire stadium was lit up red, and it looked like a huge button. And this is symbolic because when Kendrick and Drake were beefing, Drake had posted a photo of a red button.

I I forget which cartoon it was from, but it was like I think it was maybe Tom and Jerry or something like that with Tom wait. Tom is the cat. Right? With him peeking behind a table, and there's this big red button on the table, and it looks like he wants to press it. So Drake posted this photo saying that he was about to press the red button and essentially end everything.

And so Kendrick's performance I mean, the entire stadium was lit up red, which is essentially him saying this is it. This is game over. And the thing is is there were, you know, of course, a few tie ins with Drake during the performance, like with him staring right at the camera saying Drake's name and all of that jazz, but this performance wasn't really about Drake at all. At this point, we've moved past that. Kendrick has been able to use Drake and that beef for his real message, which is what he has always always always practiced through his music.

And so we began with the beginning scene of the stage being laid lit up, and it's lit up with PlayStation controller buttons. Now if you Google the buttons that light up, it gives you the Lost World Jurassic Park cheat code. Believe me. Stay with me now. Basically, a video game or a PlayStation game.

Right? It gives you a cheat code a cheat code to start the game with 59 lives. And it was the fifty ninth Super Bowl. So that's one Easter egg. Doesn't necessarily mean anything too crazy, but there's just so many things throughout this performance that were that have a lot of symbolism, which is pretty interesting.

So, by the way, I didn't find all of this on my own. I definitely did some research and watched some videos. So, anyways, another thing is that PlayStation is owned by Sony, which also owns the Santa Ana label group who partnered with Drake's group, OVO. So it's kind of like another another nod to OVO. So then we have Samuel Jackson.

Samuel Jackson Samuel Jackson as uncle Sam, and he shows up as the symbol and personification of The United States and the government. And starting out, in Kendrick's album, To Pimp a Butterfly, Uncle Sam was the nickname for that. But then it's also used in the opening track of his song, Wesley's Theory. So Kendrick mentions uncle Sam in that song, and he says, what do you want? Or sorry.

What you want? You a house? You a car? 40 acres and a mule? A piano, a guitar?

Anything. See, my name is uncle Sam. I'm your dog. And then he swears, says you can live at the mall. So long story short, 40 acres and a mule was the promise that was made to slaves after the war.

And so showing uncle Sam, it represents a country built on freedom and choices when for black people, it really wasn't. And so uncle Sam this whole time in is in the Super Bowl, and he's essentially criticizing Kendrick. And he's upset and mad at Kendrick and telling Kendrick how exactly to perform and what everyone in America really wants to see, which is, again, what Kendrick's album To Pimp a Butterfly is about is about being used as a puppet and a and a spokesperson when when you don't want to be and that you'll only find success if you do it in the most perfect form. So, anyways, this is when Kendrick comes out, and he's he's wearing a royal blue varsity jacket with the front reading Gloria, which is the last song on his album. And there's lots of meaning on his jacket.

You can kinda look it up. But, essentially, it opens up with him in front of the GNX, which the GNX is, you know, the car on the cover of the album. And everybody ends up coming out of the same car in the beginning. But then by the end of the whole performance, everyone is divided and segregated. So I don't know.

I just feel like there's a lot of there's a lot of really great symbolism here. And he begins rapping with the unreleased track bodies. And he's singing on the car's hood. People are jumping out, and everyone's wearing either red, white, or blue. And red represents valor and bravery.

And if you noticed, you'd see that there the red, dancers, they're always trailing Kendrick. They're always watching his back. Then white represents innocence and purity. Blue represents diligence and justice, and blue ends up also coming out behind the red protecting both CZA and Kendrick. And they come together many times forming parts of the American flag and the stars on the flag.

And there's also another theory that red and blue, you know, also represents the gangs, the bloods and the crips. And the hopeful unity to of basically the point that Kendrick is trying to do, he's been trying to unify everyone, the bloods and the crypts, and to take away the fact that the people are divided. We are divided because of the government, because that's the best distraction the government can give us from focusing on them. And so, yeah, super interesting. Right?

I don't know if I ever mentioned this in the past weekly Friday recap, but in his music video, Not Like Us, he actually had the Bloods and the Crips all dancing together altogether, which is insane. It it doesn't ever happen. These, you know, these gangs hate each other. It's very it's been years and years and years and years of of it. And so I thought that was really cool.

Okay. Then we see rights being stripped. We see explicit hate and our government's loss of morality, which is what Kendrick is asking for us to see when there's only the red dancers left. And I feel like it's hard to be explaining this without the video playing in the background, so I guess I won't really go too in-depth like my notes had. But, essentially, like, the choreography is amazing, and it's used to highlight a huge scope of diversity across of our nation.

And then we have uncle Sam coming out again, and he's mad. He's mad at how Kendrick is playing the American game, and he's promising, you know, you're gonna get something if you play the game correctly and if you fit this narrative, but Kendrick doesn't. And then, of course, we get, you know, be humble. I was it was so cool to see to see that and DNA. And, yeah, there's just lots of symbolism in this and even symbolism of his own journey of him almost telling himself to stay humble, but then also looking to America, you know, to not forget where where where we came from.

And then, of course, DNA is out, and we then get the glimpses of street violence and his history there because this song is about, you know, of course, how people have been treated and racism. And then there's lights that spell out warning the wrong way, which means uncle Sam could be warning him to be a little bit more palatable and digestible because that's oftentimes what hip hop and rap has been looked at as, oh, it's vulgar or it's ghetto or any of these things when a lot of it is actually culture. And so, yeah, we have uncle Sam warning him about that. And then the next song that comes on is Euphoria. And Euphoria in the rap battle is a song that came after Drake released push ups.

And this dissed the TV show that Drake, produced called Euphoria with teens and their lives. And it's, like, very, I I would say euphoria is, like, pretty would graphic be the right word? I couldn't watch it. It was way too intense for me. I got through one episode.

There's lots of drug use and abuse and addiction and toxic relationships and all of that kind of stuff. So yeah. But Drake produced this show of these teens in their lives and, yeah, really interesting. So he performed Euphoria, and then he brought us over to to this view that was different where it looked like he was walking on a road. And this was his message of everyone is too overstimulated.

We gotta get off of our phones and embrace the present moment. Of course, then uncle Sam comes out back for more, and he doesn't like it because everyone's showing their authentic self. And so he then has the scorekeeper deduct one life because you're chastised for not behaving. Right? So when he says scorekeeper deduct one life, it's really interesting because he makes a demand staring at the screen, at us as the audience, almost telling the American people to fulfill that wish of his and to, I don't know, to basically be his puppet.

And I don't know. I thought it was I thought it was really interesting. Hopefully, this isn't boring boring, you guys. If it is, I guess, you can always turn it off. Right?

Okay. So next was the song Peekaboo, and Kendrick came out with a jump scare. And this is when they're performing on the giant x. And there is a theory out there that Drake is the one that killed XXX Antician XX. I can never say his name.

That's embarrassing. But, essentially, XXX, when he was murdered, people figured it was Drake. I mean, Drake had stolen one of his songs before. X had rapped about how if he was killed, it would be Drake. So it's kind of interesting that he brought in the x into this.

Might be might be a the gesture to that might not. But yeah. So they're all performing on the giant x, and each limb of the x had different dancers representing different communities. And he finally then leads everyone to the free limb, bringing everyone, you know, quote unquote to a common ground. And he mentions a few times, he says, I wanna perform their favorite song, but, you know, they love to sue, which was him trolling Drake because Drake filed a lawsuit against Universal Music Group for promoting Not Like Us.

And then Kendrick says, you know, I'll think about it. And then the ladies come out, and SZA comes out. She is here. They perform Luther and give kind of a sneak peek of their tour. And then they perform all the stars, which is, of course, from Black Panther.

And that's really when SZA became really, really, really popular was when she was featured on that album. So that's when everyone groups together, men, women, all everyone in red, white, and blue. And, yeah, everyone's back together for Not Like Us. He explicitly says, hey, Drake, and then Serena starts, sea walking. And it's really fun because in the squabble up music video, for Kendrick I don't know if you guys know that one.

But, yeah, in the squabble up music video for his song, there was a girl dancing doing the doing the seawall in a tennis skirt. And a lot of people had the idea that she was representing Serena Williams who also grew up in Compton, and that it could be a nod to her because Serena Williams danced during the Olympics when she had won. She did the seawall, and she was criticized for it, which speaks to the entire message that he's saying of, you know, you love us when we're quiet. You know, you love Serena when she's quiet. She plays tennis, but not when she's celebrating and sea walking.

And so by this point, it's at the very end. We've got two of Drake's exes on the stage, both SZA and Serena, and then they finish it out as If You're Mad, Then Turn Your TV Off, which is another one of his songs is TV Off. Right? Isn't that the whole song? TV?

No. No. No. It's Hey Now. Is it Hey Now?

No. It's TV Off. Yeah. Literally, it's literally, it's the title of the song. So, yeah, super, super cool.

Lots of details. The recap that I watched was by Jessica Clemons, but there's so many great videos out there that talk about it. And I think the overall message is, you know, there's lots of people in really tough places right now. And having ignorant hate thrown around loosely without trying to learn about these messages and trying to understand other people's perspectives is just a waste of time. And it's just important to do your research and to formulate your own opinion.

So, yeah, that's essentially it. Sorry. I am losing my voice. I am sick. So why am I sick?

Well, let me give you a little London recap now. I left for London last Wednesday, and I went with the pest company that my ex and I owned a pest control branch with. And let me tell you, it was so much fun. I was originally a little bit nervous to go just because of the circumstances, and I also didn't really know how to explain anything. And I know I don't really need to explain anything to anyone, but I would say about 70% of them, I did not know, which is a huge change.

You know? Usually, you know, you know everyone, especially when you are in the leadership area, but it's been several years now. So whenever people would ask me, hey. Like, where are you from? I'd say, oh, you know, from Logan.

Live in Salt Lake. They say, so what do you do for Fox? Oh, I do the social media management. And then they say, oh my gosh. So how did you even meet people at Fox?

How did you get into it? And in the beginning, I was like, well, you see, like and then I would try to explain the fact that, oh, like, I'm married, but I'm getting a divorce. And and, but we used to own a branch, but, no, it's okay. Like, it's you don't have to feel sorry. It's okay.

It's all it's all gonna be fine. And then by the end, finally, I figured out that I can just say the word x. So now I feel like I have a superpower, and I can just say, oh, yeah. My ex and I owned a branch. That's how.

Like, it's so simple. And I I know it's a huge change. Believe me. I could not tell you how big of a change I have felt over the past, like, two months. Because even over Christmas and New Year's, so I guess a month and a half, I I don't know.

It comes and goes in waves. You know what I mean? And I'm not here to give a massive update, but I've essentially been separated since October. So next month will be going on month six, which is insane. That's that's a long time.

And I know they say that time heals all wounds, and I've been very doubtful of that. But for the first time in a while, last week, I really felt like I could joke and I could, you know, say the word x and not feel death by a million paper cuts for the first time. You know what I mean? So that was really nice. But, anyways, off topic.

I went to London a long time ago, which you already know if you listened to my last my last episode. And it was only for a day or so, so I didn't get to see Big Ben. It was also being it was also being re not redone, but what is it called when they are oh my goodness. Sorry. Words are escaping my brain now more than ever, especially now that I'm getting deeper into prep.

So if I ever seen brain dead, it's because I am. So I saw Big Ben. That was so fun. Was able to ride on the double decker buses quite a bit of times. I went to the London Bridge, went and rode the London Eye, which if you didn't know, that's the huge Ferris wheel.

And these the Ferris wheel, it's like they're like trams. You know, like those lifts that you take up at Snowbird for anyone outside of Utah, which I'm acknowledging you now because there are a whole ton of you. It's a ski resort here in Utah, and these rooms, they're very large. And the very first time that I went snowboarding, oh, it was the biggest mess. I'd never snowboarded a day in my life.

And there was this high school freshman trip to snowbird. And so my friend helps me basically get there. Like, I I work for her parents and raise I make money and basically because it's literally so expensive to get there. So we're really excited, and she's gonna teach me how. So we get up to the very tallest lift after taking after taking this tram.

And, basically, I just was trying to stand up and go. So you can imagine how well that worked out for me. It was terrible. I had no idea what to do. I didn't know any technique, and I felt bad because there was this whole group of people just, like, moving five feet down the hill at a time with me as I would scoot down on my butt.

So finally, I just told all of them, like, you can just go ahead. And I cried my way down that hill. It took me three hours. Was it three hours to get down the hill? It was atrocious.

It was so bad. By the time I got down to the bottom, I literally needed someone else's help to take off my boots. I didn't even know how to do that. So this older couple helped me take them off. I went into the into the ski lodge.

Everyone was in there just looking all cute, eating, asked me how I've been, how my runs have been, and I was just like, yeah. Really good. And then I went over by the fireplace. I laid down, and I slept for the rest of the trip because I became so sick. I was I was so sick.

I had, like, a fever. I lost my voice. It was horrendous. So that's my only experience snowboarding. And why why was I even talking about oh, because of the London Eye.

So, anyways, the rooms were basically as big as those trams that take you up. They can fit, you know, like, 20 people or something. So that was a really cool experience. When we were walking by it the night before, I had guessed. I was like, oh, I bet that's at least $20 to ride it.

And everyone was like, no. There's no way it's $20. That's so much money. There's no way. Well, guess how much it was the next day?

It wasn't $20. It wasn't even $30. Nope. Not 40. 40 2.

40 2 freaking dollars to get in that thing and to ride it. To ride it? To stand in it? But it was really fun, and it gave you the most amazing views of London. I really need to post some pictures and photos.

Maybe I'll do that today when I post about today's episode because it is coming out late. Sorry about that. But I wasn't originally going to do an episode today, and then I thought, you know what? It'll be fun to catch up. So, yeah, that was so much fun.

I experienced Indian Iranian food for the very first time. Essentially, these Iranians moved into Bombay, India and created this fusion of Iranian Indian food. And so then when I asked them, is this spicy? When I was ordering this little sandwich thing with this little patty, they said, no. No.

It's not spicy. When I tell you streams of tears were flushing down my face, oh, it was so, so bad. And to even just line it up on a scale of spiciness, there's this one guy at the table. He had ordered, like, chili chicken, then someone else had ordered something else spicy. I don't remember what it was.

And then there's a really spicy sauce, and I didn't wanna try any of those things. And then I ordered my sandwich. Well, my sandwich was the second hottest thing that these guys tried. Yeah. It was so spicy, but I made a joke.

I was sitting there crying, and and the guys were like, are you okay? And and I was like, yeah. Like, you know, it's not like I'm getting divorced or anything. And they just all busted up laughing. I was just trying to make jokes.

You know? And all of these people are all married and and, like, knew knew me beforehand. So, anyways, I'm just trying to, like, keep it light. You know? I don't want people to feel uncomfortable.

So, yeah, I can joke now. It it's it's not bad. So if you hear me say a joke or two, just just go with the flow. I don't know if I'm ready for jokes to be made at me just yet. I'll keep you, yeah, I'll keep you I'll keep you updated with that one.

But, yeah, moving forward, I am how many weeks out am I? I think I'm six weeks out from my very first show of the year. And I gave you oh, no. I'm seven weeks out. I gave you all a recap about my little fitness progression over the last two years in my last fitness episode.

But, essentially, I've been preparing for this competition for the past two years. You know, I did a really big bulk, and then I've been dieting since April. And it's been really slow. Obviously, when I updated you guys recently, I told you that the worst part or not really the worst part, but the hardest part has been as of late, where I've just been really, really, really tired, but it's looking good. Again, I'm at the exact weight I need to be at.

My physique is where I need to be at. I just kinda gotta hold my ground here for the next six weeks, and then I'll be going into a show. And I'm really excited to get back on stage, especially in this new division, in the new fit model division. And I did have some people ask the differences. And one of the really big differences in this division is the suit.

So I won't have to wear a thong this time around. I know. Really exciting because those suits are literally like a thong for bikini. So this one is a it covers half your glutes. So it's more of a swimsuit type material.

I ordered it. I'm really excited. I hope it I hope it looks good. I feel like it's gonna feel weird not wearing a thong, but it'll be good. Like, I'll I think it'll be great.

And maybe I can actually post, like, progress pictures from the back for the very first time because I've never shared those. I've never never done that before. I think in the context of bodybuilding, it's completely fine, obviously, because I compete in bodybuilding. But sometimes I forget that, not everyone lives in the same world that I do, you know, even though that's literally the premise of my podcast. And sometimes I just post gym pictures, and I've realized that I've become quite quite the tool.

I post a lot of tool picks. So I don't know. Is it is it too much? You gotta let me know. The other day, I posted one, and I was like, wait.

Is this is this what the youngsters call a thirst trap? Because I, like, wasn't smiling, and I thought I looked cutie. But I was like, is this doing too much? Am I too old to be doing this? And then I thought, no.

Because your twenties were spent being married. Your twenties were spent being a wife. Now your late twenties and thirties can be spent being a hoe. I'm just kidding. I'm totally kidding.

Totally kidding. Not dating. Not no. Literally nothing. Nothing.

So don't no. I'm literally you know I'm joking. Okay. Thank you. I no.

But for real. I've been a wife my entire twenties. So now now I'm not one, which is insane. I've been learning how not to do that. And so I just been having having fun, I guess.

Like, just posting whatever. I mean, I haven't really been going crazy or anything. I did actually I already shared this, how I posted, like, a hosing picture in my bikini, and then I deleted it because I was like, oh, I don't wanna come off wrong or anything like that or seeking attention. Like, the last thing I want to be seen is that I'm looking for attention because I'm not. I've just come back.

I've come back to the gram. This is always the type of stuff I had post before. I mean, just look at my progress story. All this is all this is old news, baby. So if you're new here, then then welcome.

I don't even know what this episode has been about. Sorry for yapping. Next, we have beats of the week, and then I'll finish it out with my birthday recap. So The Weeknd's album, Abyss with Lana Del Rey, I've been listening to that song nonstop. Oh my gosh.

And I just, like, belt it at the peak of my capabilities whenever I'm driving. It's so good. I love that song, Abyss. Cry for you is obviously good. It goes by a little bit quicker.

I feel like Abyss is a little bit more like, you know, like, you, like, really feel it. So that's been one on repeat. Another one that's like a fun little poppy trap mix is Dance With Me by Lucid Beats. It's kind of like, yeah, like a trap. I wouldn't call it EDM, really.

Yeah. It's I'd more so say trap. And then the next one is called Love You Anyway by The Marias. It's giving cutie Euro Summer '20 '20 '5. You know what I'm saying?

And while we're on that topic, do we have any summer plans? Raise your hand if you have any summer plans. We've got to keep our eyes focused on the prize, which is summer of twenty twenty five. Wow. I feel like that could be an ad.

No. Because about six inches of snow just dropped in my hometown, so stay safe over there, all of you guys. And then it snowed here in the mountains. And lucky for me, the snow doesn't stick to downtown Salt Lake City. So I'm fine, but I am thinking of everyone who is trudging through snow right now because, man, did we think we are going to be able to skip winter in Utah?

What a strange winter it's been. Okay. Last beat of the week. Gotta give you a workout jam. I just have to, and this is a throwback.

And it's m's. So m apostrophe dollar sign by Aseb Rocky featuring Lil Wayne. So you can already guess how that one's gonna sound, and it's great. I've been really I've been listening to that a few times this week during my workouts. Speaking of ASAP Rocky, I do have an update on his trial.

So on February 13 yesterday, they were arguing whether or not the gun that A$AP was seen carrying was real. Long story short, if you guys didn't listen to my last few episodes, A$AP Rocky is on trial for twenty four years or up to twenty four years in prison for allegedly shooting his ex bestie. Yeah. And there's a picture of him holding a gun. So on the thirteenth, the defense was saying the gun was a prop that fires only blanks, that Rocky took for security months earlier from the set of his music video for DMB, which is a music video that featured Rihanna.

And that's their argument. And then for the first time, Rihanna actually she's been frequenting she's been frequenting the trial. But for the first time yesterday, she did bring their two sons. They have a two year old and a one year old, and I won't say their names because I wish that I wish that you couldn't say kids' names online. I don't love that for them.

But, yeah, anyways, they entered the courtroom a few minutes into the closing statements. And then today, if you're sad for some reason not for some reason, for any reason. I mean, it is Valentine's Day. And if you're sad today, let's just let's just agree that you and I are lucky that we're not in trial because it could always be worse. That's something I tell myself every day of my life is it can always be worse because it's been messy.

They're in trial again today. There's been shouting mat matches about ethics. Rocky shouted at ASEP 12 e to not answer some of the prosecutor's questions. It's just looking messy. So it's gonna be really interesting what his what what happens because he was given a plea deal.

He was given a plea deal, and I'm pretty sure the plea deal was, like, a hundred and fifty or a hundred and eighty days in jail, and he denied it. He denied it. I don't think he's gonna go to prison. I really don't. Again, my brother said he absolutely did it, but he's probably not gonna go to prison as well.

So it's very interesting. But, yeah, at least you and I are not are not there. We might we might, you know, be over here single, but that's okay. It can always be worse. You know what I'm saying?

So birthday recap. Birthday was Wednesday. Thank you guys for listening to my birthday episode. I actually cannot believe how many listens that I got on that. Like, usually, it takes several weeks to get as many as I did, so that was really cool of you.

But yeah. So I woke up my I woke up on my birthday, and for holidays and everything that I've been experiencing for the first time alone, there's always, like, a little bit of a pang of grief, I feel like, when I wake up. And that's okay. That's to be expected with such a huge life change. And I really wanted to set the day and set the tone to have a good day.

So I woke up early. I got ready for the gym, and then I decided, you know what, Hannah? I'm a take you out for breakfast. So I took myself out to that restaurant, Marmalade, and I got filet mignon eggs benedict. And I oh, it was the most delicious meal.

At first, I was a little bit nervous to go by myself. I have taken myself out to brunch before, but it just felt different for some reason. Because when I'd done it before, I was married, and now I'm doing it. And it's like, I'm single. Like, this is this is the option.

It's me. And it wasn't even weird. Someone else was there doing the same thing. And it was just a lovely breakfast. And then I sat there, enjoyed my space for a little bit.

It was pretty early, so they they didn't really need my table for anything. So I sat there for, I don't know, maybe fifteen or twenty minutes and just, like, hung out and then set my schedule for the day. And then I went to the gym, and my lift was was okay. I wasn't feeling super strong, but I did drink an energy drink. Only half.

I'm down to half. I will not drink a full one each day. So half of an energy drink. I will be working on quitting caffeinated drinks after my shows. But with my brainpower being up 50% because of my calories, it's not the time to quit right now.

You know what I'm saying? So then I went home and just kinda, like, hung out and got coffee with my dad. Oh, so I guess I did have more caffeine right there. It's okay. Ignore that.

And then I had dinner with my mom and all of my siblings, and they made me feel really special. And I'd be lying if I said it was, like, an easy day or that it felt the same as my past birthdays or just as good. I I mean, I only cried three times. So I don't know. It's really weird.

It almost felt like a step backward in my in my, quote, unquote, healing journey, but I know that it's not. I know that it's not because it's just what happens. That's what learning to be alone is. And I would rather be, you know, lonely by myself any day than lonely with somebody else. And so I'm really learning to be able to be alone and to be happy in it.

And I think that is something that if you're listening and you are single, learning to be able to be alone is something that is so important, and I've always considered myself really independent. But at the end of the day, I always had somebody else looking out for me. You know what I'm saying? And I think that that might be one of the hardest parts. It's suddenly, you know, you're only looking out for you.

Not to say, you know, there's not a lot of friends and family that aren't as well, of course, but you you are your responsibility 115%, and you've gotta take care of you. And so in case nobody has told you this yet today, you are so loved. Whether you're single, whether you're married, in between, figuring it out, Valentine's Day isn't, you know, all about the big grand gestures or the picture perfect romances. It's about love in every single form. Love for yourself, love from your people, love for your people, and love that can still exist even in the midst of change.

So if today feels heavy at all for you, I see you. And if today feels really joyful, then I celebrate with you because no matter where you're at, you are always worthy of love, care, and kindness. So please do not settle for anything less. Okay? Not just today, but every single day.

I'm sending you guys all the love in the world from me to you. Thank you so much for listening to another episode of the Unrelatable podcast, and I will talk to you guys so soon. Bye.